July 7, 2021

On Gentle Pens and Poison Tongues

Grief does strange things to people. When the heart feels like it has a hole large enough to drive a truck through, it can be easy to lash out at others. Even (and perhaps especially) those who love us most. So when I recently found myself on the receiving end of this kind of toxicity, I had to take a moment and breathe. The temptation was — and is — strong to set the record straight by returning fire for fire. But retaliation does nothing to put out the fire. It merely doubles it. What does it mean to be “strong” in this context? It’s something I’ve […]
June 1, 2021

When It’s Time to Say Goodbye

Maybe it’s just that time of life: Death has tapped me on the shoulder three times in the past two weeks. Twice our family has driven at least eight hours over the course of a weekend to pay our respects, all the while talking about why a God who loves us would allow a horrible thing like Death to enter the world. What I’ve come to realize is that dying is not the worst thing that can happen. Or should I say, “becoming dead.” Dying can actually be painful and scary as much for the loved ones looking on as for the one who is […]